they call holidays an option for good reason

sometimes things take a little a while
tonite was meant to happen
& it made this fairly shitty week
completely ok & worthwhile

life is a movie sometimes

im in dc tomorrow
nyc sunday
& canada there after

ive never been one for new years
my own personal new years
is usually around april 10

but a few albums have really been there for me this year
so i thought id make a list
1) the gaslight anthem "the 59 sound"
2) polar bear club "sometimes things just disappear"
3) dillinger four "civil war"
4) la grecia "on parallels"

ive had a year of ups & downs
but if tonites any indicator of the future
2009 should be pretty amazing

my fists in the air

telling someone who thinks they can do no wrong
exactly what theyve done wrong
is just a waste of your own breath & time
all you can do
is learn from them
& make sure you dont follow in their footsteps

ive never been one to just sit back
& let shit happen
ive made a life of calling people out
on their shit
but this time
im biting my tongue
& i can only assume
ill be tasting blood

keeping the peace
in a war torn state

ive never been
& never will be
who you need
or want me to be

ive watched the 2nd season
of how i met your mother
& am about half way done with season 3

i am not anything

its a weird feeling that comes over me
when the big blue house is empty
my bed is in the front bay window
when i lay down
the rest of the house is before me
& it feels like an infinite calm

lancaster tomorrow
im going into it with the best intentions

my music purchases have been a bit ridiculous

im ready to be traveling
this time next week
ill be in monroe new york with sara
& soon after niagra falls
& possibly toronto
its a pretty open ended trip
which is the only way i can imagine it being

im going to try & sleep some tonite
im taking the train tomorrow
& i always have mild anxiety with trains
planes buses cars are all fine
but i fucking hate trains

silence is hard to find

shorebirds "its gonna get ugly" owns

random adventures with best friends
in other peoples cars
is the best way to spend an afternoon

i need snow
& i need it now

the roommates will all be gone
by tomorrow when i wake up
& i cant decide
if im happy or sad

i cant wait for break
adventures with sara
& a roadtrip with my dad
& 4 days in lancaster
sounds like an awesome fucking time

too much caffeine in the blood stream

the semesters over
its nice but also weird
i was continuously moving for 3 weeks
& now suddenly it all comes to a dead halt

my photo final went over well
everyone liked it
i still dont

lancaster
this time next week
should be interesting
considering i wont have a car

i cant wait to be traveling

im saving this seat for you

i went to a formal last nite
having no previous knowledge of what a formal was
i agreed then realized what i had gotten myself into
i never went to a dance in high school
so i felt like this would be a learning experience
& i learned i didnt miss out on anything by not going

also when my "date" answered her door
she looked me up & down
& said
you look like the fucking unabomber
thats how i do formal i guess

it took me a while to get into the new dillinger four
but now that i am
its all i can listen to

fiddling while rome burns

im an asshole because i care
when a girl im attracted to
shows any possibility
of even coming close to reciprocating
any interest
i become an asshole
& make rude & mean comments
its my defense mechanism
to save me or her
ive yet to figure out

over winter break im going to niagra falls & florida

im trying to do a lot
& change alot

the book will hopefully be a fairly intense project
concepts
titles
inspirations
everything slowly coming together

currently listening
less than jake "in with the out crowd"

picking poisons & talking shit

i fucked up again
kind of ironic
that i realize this
while in the process
of completing a series
based on my ability
to continually destroy
any sort of relationship im in

listening:
the number twelve looks like you "mongrel"
circle takes the square "as the roots undo"
planes mistaken for stars "up in them guts"