theres a pipebomb on the dancefloor of my mind

a portrait of self destruction

latterman "water manes at the blocks end"
pinback "non-photo blue"
rainer maria "tinfoil"
the mall "dusk magnets"
xo skeletons "town crier"
comeback kid "partners in crime"
i hate sally "hannah hannah"
i am the avalanche "this is dungeon music"
hot water music "trusty chords"
the get up kids "campfire kansas"
saves the day "jessie & my whetstone"
ra ra riot "everest"
jawbreaker "bad scene everyones fault"
less than jake "escape from the a bomb house"
the promise ring "happiness is all the rage"
brand new "logan to government center"
lifetime "myself"
elliott smith "i dont think im ever gonna figure it out"
polar bear club "convinced im wrong"
the blood brothers "ambulance vs ambulance"
give up the ghost "we killed it"

us against the world

lets all just laugh at what we have become

i need a windshield built for war

polar bear clubs "sometimes things just disappear" was the soundtrack to my trip this time.
i picked it up in philly. i had a good couple days there.
lancaster consisted of screaming matches too much coffee & a nite of songs on repeat trying to stay warm.
va beach was good it was good to be with my family & my dad. it was filled with moments of striking clarity terrible grief & one beautiful moment that made my entire life worthwhile.
im back in d.c. & im a headcase. im restless & hopeless.

i love you so much its killing us both

jawbreakers "dear you" and this is hells "misfortunes" have been on repeat for a week and its my life entirely these days
im nostalgic and i hate it
i need away from everything for a little bit

break what breaks your heart

i want that connection
that person i can stay up and watch the sunrise with
that person that would lay on broken glass for me to walk across
that person you would kill anyone for
i want that best friend

friends have been scarce lately
as in pretty much none
some have stopped talking
others have become different people
and others werent good to begin with
i want to drop out and move to pdx
it costs less than 300 for a greyhound ticket across the country
spring break is coming up...

my dads moving back to va beach
which will be good for him and i both
im trying to work on a new book but its just not there
my heads a jumbled mess of words that i cant put to paper
(you are nothing to no one/stop telling yourself different)